Acting AS IF…
When I find myself experiencing the mood sensations of fatigue, overwhelm, despair, morose, sullenness, and discouragement, it is very hard for me to shift into a more energizing and pleasant state, let alone take action. The combination of feelings often feels like a heaviness that only time itself can remove. Today I have felt this […]
The Russian Doll Method: Models Mapped on Top of Other Models
I like mapping models on top of other models. Even though no two models are exactly the same, it is in overlaying ones that are similar enough that you begin to see more opportunities for how to flexibly apply them, especially when filtered through the interrelated relationships of self-awareness, self-regulation, and self-reflection. For example, Carol […]
Distinction: Solid Talk vs. Soft Talk
From the Procabulary Model Solid Talk: The use of clear, direct, powerful language to effectively communicate your thoughts about a particular concept or choice. Soft Talk: The excessive use of softening words to create ambiguity, uncertainty, and avoidance about a particular concept or choice. Self-Awareness: I have become aware of over using the soft-talk phrase […]
Becoming Adaptable
Most people think of resilience as a psychological skill that leads to other outcomes such as accomplishment, growth, and well-being. However, George Bonanno, a professor of clinical psychology and a renowned researcher on resilience, thinks and talks about resilience as an outcome of other psychological skills–one of those skills being psychological flexibility. Steven Kotler’s The […]
“What Did I Do Wrong?”
(This post is a continuation on the mental skill of untangling fact from story“ Fact: I received this text message: “hey man—have a couple of minutes?” Story (I started to make up): “uh, oh… what did I do wrong? What did I write, say, or imply that is being viewed as problematic, offensive, or insensitive.” […]
If Inner Peace is Not the Same as Happiness, Then What is It?
Happiness is great, but, often, very situationally dependent. Happiness is great but, often, can’t be felt when feeling other contrasting emotions. Happiness is great but, often, when it is the goal in and of itself, the experience doesn’t measure up to the expectation. Peace, on the other hand, doesn’t depend on the situation. Peace can […]
Taking Radical Responsibility
“I commit to taking full responsibility for the circumstances of my life and for my physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. I commit to supporting others to take full responsibility for their lives” Commitment 1: Jim Dethmer, Diana Chapman, and Kaley Warner Klemp The opposite of taking responsibility is placing blame. Placing blame puts us […]
HAPPINESS of PURSUIT vs. Pursuit of Happiness
Adam Grant ends his book Originals with the statement: “Becoming original is not the easiest path in the pursuit of happiness, but it leaves us perfectly poised for the happiness of pursuit.” Similarly, Seth Godin preaches “‘do what you love’ is for amateurs. ‘Love what you do’ is the mantra for professionals.” During adolescence, we […]
HARD WORK (as opposed to Hard to Do Work)
Cal Newport makes this distinction between “hard work,” which is often an inevitable experience of doing deep work (ability to focus without distraction on a cognitively demanding task), and “hard to do work,” which is work that is just grueling, draining, not enjoyable, and doesn’t lead to any future pay off. At the core of […]
Have You Ever Noticed…?
This phrase is a master at orchestrating attention and it does so without being showy, loud, rude, demanding, nor insincere. This phrase is similar to “hey, come over here… check this out.” What they both have in common is an inherent desire to connect. Connection is the act of sharing world views in lieu of […]
