Coaching, leading, and teaching are words that are susceptible to a lot of confusion and mismanaged expectations. I believe the reason for this is because these words are all professional titles as well as behaviors, values, and ways of being.
“Coaching is available to all of us and is not a profession, but a way of being with each other,” (Peter Block).
I whole heartedly believe in this worldview. My definition for coaching is “ the generous act of helping someone to live and/or tell their story.” This definition is inclusive of self-coaching. When you coach, you ask questions, specifically the kinds of questions that get people to reflect on where they are now and where they want to be. Then you guide them to take action to move beyond their current state of comfort and experience level.
Coaching as a way of being is predicated on three EXs: EXperience, EXperimentation, and EXample.
EXperience : Who are you? How have you gotten here? What is worth holding on to and leveraging? What do you wish to let go of?
EXperimentation : What’s the real challenge here for you? What do you want? What are you working on? What hypotheses are you testing in your life? What else could you try? What other options do you have? What have you changed your mind about?
EXample : Who are your role models? What is the model example of your future self you are striving toward? What would it feel like to reach this level of openness, poise, grace, and sufficiency? What will your legacy be?